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Archive for June, 2007

Reconnecting…

With my dissertation, that is.

This YouTube trailer is pretty much my whole dissertation in a nutshell (no, I’m not writing on this movie, specifically; spot the incongruity here, and you’ll have my topic):

(They were showing Days of Being Wild on TV the other night, and it’s been on my mind ever since…)

ETA: Actually, watching the trailer the whole way through, it turns out I can/should be using it in the dissertation; there’s some stuff right here that’s pretty salient to one part of a discussion I’m working on right now.  Who knew?

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Spoke too soon…

Minutes after I typed that, I had a call from the genetic counselor (a good sign, since she said bad news might come from the doctor, instead) saying that we passed our chromosome test – so we do not have to make that decision.

But, as always, our good result makes me think of all the parents who aren’t so fortunate and either have some serious adjusting to do or a terrible decision to make. We’re lucky – that’s all – and certainly not because we deserve it more than anyone else. And, of course, once sperm meets egg you’re never out of the woods until you successfully manage to die of old age before your own kid(s) – it’s all such a crap shoot.

Sorry for the morbid turn – I just realized, between my pregnancy with MM and this one, that we control pretty much squat. We can try to influence things, but that’s about as far as we get. Everything else is pretty much luck of the draw. But, in the meantime, I’m so, so relieved that this one decision – the one I’m personally most ambivalent about – has passed us over.

And, for the big news:

It’s a boy. Which I totally kind of knew, given the very different morning sickness (ie: I’m hungry when I’m not feeling like barfing. That never happened with the girl, that’s for damned sure. I even think about all kinds of food preparation – not something I’m generally inclined to do, as my husband will attest – when I’m not down for the count. I have a feeling I’m going to have to watch my weight this time around).

So, to sum up: chromosomes, okay. Spina bifida test at 16 wks. Detailed ultrasound to look at organs (or lack thereof) near 18-ish weeks. Overweight, hypertensive, hypothyroid (but, really, only just) old lady body has to keep up the good work – we’re not out of the woods, but we do not have to make that one decision, for which I’m unspeakably grateful.

(Really, I’m in a much better place than in my first pregnancy. I know it doesn’t sound like it, but I’m mostly just ritualistically ‘naming’ the possible issues in an attempt to recognize and dismiss them. Unlike last time, I officially do not sit around haunting the Internet for hours on end this time. Really.)

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All quiet…

Not too much to say – still waiting to hear.  I hate this.

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  1. Got some dissertation writing done.  It’s crap, but some crap is better than no crap.  I keep trying to think of it like a marble sculpture; you have to start chipping away somewhere, and it never starts out looking like the finished product.  And if you spend all your time refining, say, a nose, the sculpture as a whole never gets done.
  2. We’re thinking we’ll have the CVS results sometime (late) this week.  I admit, I’m nervous.  M.’s nervous.  We have an idea what we’ll do with bad results, should they come, but you don’t know until you’re standing there looking at them.  We’d both rather know and make an informed decision, but it’s a decision that nobody ever wants to have to make.
  3. The dryer repair guy is here for the second time.  Last time he looked, couldn’t find anything wrong, got it to heat briefly, and took off.  Upon which it promptly crapped out again.  He’s been in there a lot longer this time, so I’m keeping my fingers crossed that this will do the trick; I’ve got piles of dirty clothes stacking up around the house and it’s getting kind of gross.
  4. Still having morning sickness.  No barfing (there never was any), just nausea.  Wonderful, wonderful nausea.  It’s more-or-less latent during the daytime, but come about 5:30 in the evening and I just. don’t. care. anymore.
  5. In happy news, M.’s sister, N., gave birth to a healthy baby girl on Friday.  We’re an uncle and auntie again! 🙂

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The Zoo

Actually, in my usual slacker way, I only took three pictures at the zoo, and one of them didn’t come out very well. These are the two that did – while we were waiting for the wagon ride to see the ostriches and camels and zebras.

and one with Daddy

And, in other news, MM and I went over to the nearby Kam Sam Food Product grocery store this morning; I’d forgotten how much I love that place. It smells like Hong Kong (which is to say, home), and I stocked up on a bunch of stuff to take over to my parents (as thank yous for all the help they’ve been giving us lately on the home/toddler front). They also sell char siu, although it was an hour before it was going to be ready when we were there, so I didn’t get any. Since my char siu experiments are iffy at best, I might swing by there this afternoon and see if they have any left.

I do love living in this part of NoVA.

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The second night we tried the toddler bed, MM had quite the meltdown. She came to the door three times, sobbing, and only got into bed after I reassured her that she was a good girl for giving it a try. In the morning she woke up, discovered she was in the bed, got hysterical, came to the door, discovered the gate, and really got hysterical.

I decided to move her back to the crib that night.

The next morning, I discovered her hanging from the outside of the crib railing yelling “Heeeelp!” and we moved back to the toddler bed in the evening.

She started going down well enough (if a little tearfully), with many reassurances that she was doing a very good job, but morning was still kind of traumatic.

Last night, she actually got into bed without much coercion, no tears, and woke up (this is the important part) in a good mood without hysterics. She called out to me, near tears, at about 6 am, I called back to her, told her to play with her toys or read her books, and she did – until about 7!!

Mommy was a happy camper. Toddler seems much more mellow this morning. All in all, a good night/morning.

We also took her to a local private zoo yesterday, on Kim’s recommendation. MM discovered that she really doesn’t like goats, sheep, or geese in person (I’m with her here – I’m not crazy about belligerent animals, myself), but she really, really liked seeing the ostriches, camel, chickens, bunnies, and horsies. The chickens, in particular, made a big impression.

The one drawback was that this place consists mainly of gravel paths, which renders M.’s scooter essentially useless. He tried to make it down one path, got stuck, and it took me and another woman to drag the scooter over to a grassy area so he could ride it back to the pavement. I wonder what the rationale for the gravel is…?

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Okay, so, I made nice with M., heard from an old friend (who actually wasn’t who I was talking about in the earlier post, but it’s always very nice to hear from old friends!), and generally brought myself (and probably my problematic blood pressure) back down to a reasonable level.  Oh, and the mail from the landlord helped, too (my husband’s remark that he knew about the $75 thing, after telling me first that we’d have to buy a new dryer ourselves, and then backing down to “we’ll just have to pay for the repair,” didn’t help as much – grrrrrrr.  That man absolutely cannot admit when he’s just plain wrong!).

So, an update on the toddler bed situation: she actually slept well in the bed last night.  We did everything exactly the same way we do it every night – milk with Daddy, three books with Mommy, then our goodnight script and lights out.  And she did it all very well…but we were very, very tearful when we went through our scripted lines at the end.  She kept looking over at the empty crib and her little lower lip just wobbled – it was very pathetic and I felt horrible for inflicting the change on her.  I know that when she gets used to it, she’ll love it and probably start getting up to see what she can get away with.  But, in the meantime, it’s a big change – probably the first really big change of her whole life.

And, in other toddler news, she’s discovered that if she lies on her belly with her arms under her stomach, her hands reach down to where it (apparently) feels very nice.  She’s been doing a lot of this lately…I guess it was only a matter of time.

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